How old do I look? Don’t ask Microsoft…

1 May 2015

Quizzical chimp, via Shutterstock

Microsoft is currently trolling the internet with a new website that it has just created. Now, by uploading a selfie of yourself, it spouts out an estimate of your age – and it’s terrible.

It’s Friday, so really it’s the ideal website to help pass some fruitless time ahead of a long weekend (if you’re lucky enough to live in a country with a Bank Holiday weekend on the go).

In truth it also provides a key service for society. What happens if you have forgotten how old you are and only have access to a smartphone, a computer and the internet?

The only solution, it seems, is So you can compare yourself to celebrities like Cher (44!), Barack Obama (46), Michael D Higgins (70) or, the winner, Panti Bliss (27).

Cher, 44

Obama, 46

Panti Bliss, 27

It’s quite a discriminatory piece of kit, though, because it refuses to accept that Kermit the Frog has a face.

Kermit, unaging

Although topless Vladimir Putin does look remarkably young. His 30th is going to be a hell of a party.

Putin, 29

In the interest of honesty and forwardness, we had some fun in here too. And also, Microsoft got our ages wrong by a collective 16 years, and discovered that Dean Van Nguyen is but a faceless rabble-rouser.

Colm Gorey, 28

Colm Gorey: “I am an ageless adonis.”

Elaine Burke, 29

Elaine Burke: “Wow, Colm is an ageless adonis.”

Gordon Hunt, 38

Gordon Hunt: “It’s so hard to find good photographers…”

John Kennedy, 46

John Kennedy: “I dispute these findings.”

Dean Van Nguyen, ageless

Dean Van Nguyen: “Incomputable looks. My face is my shield, my hair is my sword.”


Quizzical chimp image, via Shutterstock

Gordon Hunt was a journalist with Silicon Republic