#Piggate puns are a bacon of hope in this pork world

22 Sep 2015

Pigs are the internet’s new favourite animal after a debauched rumour about UK prime minister David Cameron hit the papers. Photo via Igor Stramyk/Shutterstock

I’ve been making a pig of myself on the porcine punchlines ribbing David Cameron, and now I’m going the whole hog to bring them to you.

Twitter has been rolling in it since Sunday night – happy as a pig in mud – as users roasted UK Prime Minister David Cameron on the back of claims he engaged in a bizarre initiation rite with a pig’s head back in his college days.

Lord Ashcroft’s unauthorised biography of Cameron has been serialised in the Daily Mail, and Monday’s paper includes some hamning allegations.

The book, Call Me Dave, alleges that Cameron was a bit of a party animal at Oxford University and a member of a secret club called the Piers Gaveston Society, which was known to go a bit hog-wild at parties. (Without knowing the particulars, I bet they left places looking like a pigsty.)

But it was the pig tales that left me (pork) scratchings my head. What kind of piggy in the middle game were they playing? Did Cameron swine and dine this Babe? Or is this what goes down when you get an invite to come over for ‘Netflix and swill’?

I suppose we’ve all been a guinea pig for experimental experiences in our feckless youth.

The curl in the tale came when similarities were drawn with a plotline in TV series Black Mirror, though I bet when Charlie Brooker penned that one he thought it would only play out in real life when pigs fly.

Now let’s not go and buy a pig in a poke here as the unnamed source of these allegations may well be telling porkies. It could all turn out to be snout but a prank and we’ll be sorry we ever swallowed this tripe.

A statement from No 10 Downing Street has flatly refused to dignify these rumours with a response, and without some solid proof this is surely a mere truffle to Cameron. A fly in the oinkment of his UK leadership.

Still, though, even if this is the trotting out of a ham-fisted attempt to discredit a world leader, that hasn’t stopped this little piggy from pigging out on crackling good puns – some of which left me squealing like a stuck pig with laughter.

On Twitter, the jokes were coming fast enough to make your head spin like a pig on a spit. There was no time lost in setting up parody accounts to take the pigs, and Wikipedia had to take measures to stop things from going pork belly up.

I won’t boar you to tears solely piggybacking on Twitter comments – that’s been done (and, as the saying goes, you can’t make a silk purse from a sow’s ear). But I have snuffled out some of the best prime cuts or you to suckle on.

My one criticism of this punning celebration, however, is the hashtag of choice: #piggate. I really think we made a pig’s ear of this when #BaeofPigs was ready and waiting, though I appreciate those who opted for the more palatable #Hameron.

I suppose I could leave you with the closing words of the great Porky Pig – but I’d rasher not.

Gigglebit is Siliconrepublic.com’s daily dose of the funny and fantastic in science and tech, to help start your day on a lighter note.

Pig photo by Igor Stramyk via Shutterstock

Elaine Burke is the host of For Tech’s Sake, a co-production from Silicon Republic and The HeadStuff Podcast Network. She was previously the editor of Silicon Republic.